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Mar. 2nd, 2008 10:47 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
elvenpirateladyHere it is, the first week of uni in all its glory... not that I witnessed much of it, as the following narrative will show. You only need know that whatever happens to me, I keep my appetite. Stress, illness, emotional turmoil, fatigue - none of this affects me in my desire to eat things when I'm hungry. I take it as a sign that something is going very wrong when I literally cannot eat more than two mouthfuls of food, so after a week of it...
SATURDAY
EL: All is well and good, I'm going back to uni in two days and everything is at it should be... stomach, aren't you meant to be bugging me about now?
STOMACH: ...
EL: That's odd, but I'm sure it's nothing.
SUNDAY
EL: *reads incredibly silly book about pirates* Why am I feeling woozy?
WOOZINESS: *dispells*
EL: Alright then. *continues reading, eats apple*
STOMACH: Argh, do not want!
EL: But it's an apple, and we love apples, and it's not even that big...
STOMACH: Too much, I say!
EL: Stop being such a baby. *proceeds to finish the apple*
STOMACH: I shall have my revenge.
EL: *has soup for tea, eats about half* What is going on?
STOMACH: Told you so.
EL: Shut up.
MONDAY
EL: First day of uni!
BRAIN: uuuuuuurrrrrrgggghhhh
STOMACH: I concur. No breakfast for us, I pray thee.
EL: What's going on? It's not like we have to be there early...
BRAIN AND STOMACH: *present united front of uuuuuurrrrrrgggghhhness*
EL: Or we could rest a while, I don't have a tute until twelve.
EL: *sleeps*
EL: *wakes up in evening* Oh, wonderful. Are you feeling better, at least?
BRAIN: Slightly.
STOMACH: If by 'better' you mean 'passable as long as no-one mentions food', then yes.
EL: What is going on?
TUESDAY
EL: Must get up, have tute at nine, must get up, have tute at nine...
BRAIN: Not a good idea.
STOMACH: If you make me eat, I cannot be held responsible for the consequences.
EL: *dozes on bus* *gets to tute 20mins late*
TUTOR: *is not there*
EL: *has flashback to IB geography*
BRAIN AND STOMACH: Why did you make us come here?
EL: Good question, that. Stuff this, we'll go and sleep in the library for a while.
EL: *sleeps on beanbags and wakes up in time to work at cafe. Surprisingly, stomach and brain do not contest this.*
EL: And now we'll go to our lecture...
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Nooooooooooo!
EL: Or we could go back to the beanbags. No, the beanbags are fine.
LATER THAT NIGHT:
EMAIL: Dear class, no geography tutes this week, byeeeeeeee!
DATESTAMP: I clearly show that this was sent at 4 in the afternoon, meaning that however wrote this is scrambling to cover their ass.
EL: I LOATHE AND DESPISE YOU.
STOMACH: Were I hungry, it would be for blood.
WEDNESDAY
EL: Must get up, lecture at nine, must get up, lecture at nine...
BRAIN: We can skip it.
EL: No, we can't. And I'm eating breakfast today.
BRAIN AND STOMACH: But after what happened yesterday-
EL: SHUT UP YOU I AM IN CHARGE OF THIS BODY AND WHAT I SAY GOES.
STOMACH: If all else fails, passive resistance is the key.
EL: *eats a grape and a glass of water*
STOMACH: There, we're done.
EL: No, you can't possibly be -
STOMACH: FULL, I SAY!
EL: *gives up and goes to uni, albeit twenty minutes late due to the eternal enemy, morning traffic.*
LECTURER: *glare*
EL: There goes my distinction in geology.
EL: *works at cafe, which again is not protested. Since there is a four-hour gap between classes, El ends up working there longer than expected. Everybody and their mother wants toasted sandwiches.*
EL: Stomach, something is wrong here. You should have turned yourself into a black hole from hunger by now.
STOMACH: Do not speak to me of food, wicked sorceress!
EL: Uh-huh. Brain?
BRAIN: I've found this awesome new thing, it's called panadol and I can't live without it!
EL: Rebellion on two fronts. God knows how the Romans ever managed. *sleeps on beanbags again at the library, takes many panadols*
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Aaah.
EL: You're going to be alright tomorrow, aren't you? It'll be really gentle, we'll go in at eleven and it's a geology lecture...
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Sure, babe. Whatever you say.
THURSDAY
EL: Gentle thursday, most blessed of days! Right, we're getting up and everything will work out fine.
BRAIN: ALAAAAAARM! MAYDAY, MAYDAY!
EL: What the hell is wrong with you? You were fine yesterday...
STOMACH: I have no feelings whatsoever on this matter, except this: if you try and give me food, you'll find it coming right back atcha.
EL: How can you endure 9am classes without a fuss and yet go spazz over an eleven-o'clock lecture?
BRAIN: ABORT ABORT ABORT!
STOMACH: While I desire to be the Switzerland to your Second World War, I must agree with my grey colleague.
EL: I hate you both. *sleeps until 4pm* There, happy?
STOMACH: If I die, tell my wife... hello.
BRAIN: Paaaaaaanadol...
EL: Words cannot describe how much I detest both of you right now, so I shall do my Latin homework instead.
LATIN HOMEWORK: *sings sweetly*
EL: Hmm, perhaps I should do all my translations when I'm delirious.
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Can we go back to sleep now?
EL: We've only been awake for five hours!
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Cats manage on less. Bed. Now.
EMAIL: Atmo tutes start next week, byeeeee!
EL: Oh, good, that means we don't have to go in until twelve. We can manage that, can't we?
STOMACH AND BRAIN: No further comment.
FRIDAY
EL: Wake up, wake up! I'd like to get to at least one tute this week!
STOMACH: Grrrp?
EL: Stomach, did you growl? Are you hungry?
STOMACH: I... I do believe I am.
BRAIN: I may faint.
EL: Don't you dare.
STOMACH: I demand toast! And jam! Sweet, sweet jammy jam...
EL: Your wish is my command.
BRAIN: I believe I am free of that drug, panadol.
EL: You say that after I acquire two packets, just for you?
BRAIN: I'm sure I'll need it again one day.
EL: *goes to uni. Stomach rallies magnificently and manages to eat small portions of both lunch and dinner. Brain watches over all benevolently and begins the start of a lovely relationship with Latin.*
EL: Ah, I love you both. Don't ever change.
APPENDIX: What about me?
EL: Hell no. You'll be first against thewall operating table when the revolution comes.
[Exeunt]
SATURDAY
EL: All is well and good, I'm going back to uni in two days and everything is at it should be... stomach, aren't you meant to be bugging me about now?
STOMACH: ...
EL: That's odd, but I'm sure it's nothing.
SUNDAY
EL: *reads incredibly silly book about pirates* Why am I feeling woozy?
WOOZINESS: *dispells*
EL: Alright then. *continues reading, eats apple*
STOMACH: Argh, do not want!
EL: But it's an apple, and we love apples, and it's not even that big...
STOMACH: Too much, I say!
EL: Stop being such a baby. *proceeds to finish the apple*
STOMACH: I shall have my revenge.
EL: *has soup for tea, eats about half* What is going on?
STOMACH: Told you so.
EL: Shut up.
MONDAY
EL: First day of uni!
BRAIN: uuuuuuurrrrrrgggghhhh
STOMACH: I concur. No breakfast for us, I pray thee.
EL: What's going on? It's not like we have to be there early...
BRAIN AND STOMACH: *present united front of uuuuuurrrrrrgggghhhness*
EL: Or we could rest a while, I don't have a tute until twelve.
EL: *sleeps*
EL: *wakes up in evening* Oh, wonderful. Are you feeling better, at least?
BRAIN: Slightly.
STOMACH: If by 'better' you mean 'passable as long as no-one mentions food', then yes.
EL: What is going on?
TUESDAY
EL: Must get up, have tute at nine, must get up, have tute at nine...
BRAIN: Not a good idea.
STOMACH: If you make me eat, I cannot be held responsible for the consequences.
EL: *dozes on bus* *gets to tute 20mins late*
TUTOR: *is not there*
EL: *has flashback to IB geography*
BRAIN AND STOMACH: Why did you make us come here?
EL: Good question, that. Stuff this, we'll go and sleep in the library for a while.
EL: *sleeps on beanbags and wakes up in time to work at cafe. Surprisingly, stomach and brain do not contest this.*
EL: And now we'll go to our lecture...
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Nooooooooooo!
EL: Or we could go back to the beanbags. No, the beanbags are fine.
LATER THAT NIGHT:
EMAIL: Dear class, no geography tutes this week, byeeeeeeee!
DATESTAMP: I clearly show that this was sent at 4 in the afternoon, meaning that however wrote this is scrambling to cover their ass.
EL: I LOATHE AND DESPISE YOU.
STOMACH: Were I hungry, it would be for blood.
WEDNESDAY
EL: Must get up, lecture at nine, must get up, lecture at nine...
BRAIN: We can skip it.
EL: No, we can't. And I'm eating breakfast today.
BRAIN AND STOMACH: But after what happened yesterday-
EL: SHUT UP YOU I AM IN CHARGE OF THIS BODY AND WHAT I SAY GOES.
STOMACH: If all else fails, passive resistance is the key.
EL: *eats a grape and a glass of water*
STOMACH: There, we're done.
EL: No, you can't possibly be -
STOMACH: FULL, I SAY!
EL: *gives up and goes to uni, albeit twenty minutes late due to the eternal enemy, morning traffic.*
LECTURER: *glare*
EL: There goes my distinction in geology.
EL: *works at cafe, which again is not protested. Since there is a four-hour gap between classes, El ends up working there longer than expected. Everybody and their mother wants toasted sandwiches.*
EL: Stomach, something is wrong here. You should have turned yourself into a black hole from hunger by now.
STOMACH: Do not speak to me of food, wicked sorceress!
EL: Uh-huh. Brain?
BRAIN: I've found this awesome new thing, it's called panadol and I can't live without it!
EL: Rebellion on two fronts. God knows how the Romans ever managed. *sleeps on beanbags again at the library, takes many panadols*
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Aaah.
EL: You're going to be alright tomorrow, aren't you? It'll be really gentle, we'll go in at eleven and it's a geology lecture...
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Sure, babe. Whatever you say.
THURSDAY
EL: Gentle thursday, most blessed of days! Right, we're getting up and everything will work out fine.
BRAIN: ALAAAAAARM! MAYDAY, MAYDAY!
EL: What the hell is wrong with you? You were fine yesterday...
STOMACH: I have no feelings whatsoever on this matter, except this: if you try and give me food, you'll find it coming right back atcha.
EL: How can you endure 9am classes without a fuss and yet go spazz over an eleven-o'clock lecture?
BRAIN: ABORT ABORT ABORT!
STOMACH: While I desire to be the Switzerland to your Second World War, I must agree with my grey colleague.
EL: I hate you both. *sleeps until 4pm* There, happy?
STOMACH: If I die, tell my wife... hello.
BRAIN: Paaaaaaanadol...
EL: Words cannot describe how much I detest both of you right now, so I shall do my Latin homework instead.
LATIN HOMEWORK: *sings sweetly*
EL: Hmm, perhaps I should do all my translations when I'm delirious.
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Can we go back to sleep now?
EL: We've only been awake for five hours!
STOMACH AND BRAIN: Cats manage on less. Bed. Now.
EMAIL: Atmo tutes start next week, byeeeee!
EL: Oh, good, that means we don't have to go in until twelve. We can manage that, can't we?
STOMACH AND BRAIN: No further comment.
FRIDAY
EL: Wake up, wake up! I'd like to get to at least one tute this week!
STOMACH: Grrrp?
EL: Stomach, did you growl? Are you hungry?
STOMACH: I... I do believe I am.
BRAIN: I may faint.
EL: Don't you dare.
STOMACH: I demand toast! And jam! Sweet, sweet jammy jam...
EL: Your wish is my command.
BRAIN: I believe I am free of that drug, panadol.
EL: You say that after I acquire two packets, just for you?
BRAIN: I'm sure I'll need it again one day.
EL: *goes to uni. Stomach rallies magnificently and manages to eat small portions of both lunch and dinner. Brain watches over all benevolently and begins the start of a lovely relationship with Latin.*
EL: Ah, I love you both. Don't ever change.
APPENDIX: What about me?
EL: Hell no. You'll be first against the
[Exeunt]
In other news, it's back to Middle-earth month, ABC2 is showing the Ninth Doctor Who series again, and the FOME barbeque brought me to unheard-of levels of geekery yesterday, but they like Yugioh: TAB and xkcd so it's all good. And we're going to the guide dog open day to see puppies!
The next post will come to you from the futuuuuuuure! ...so until then, farewell.
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no subject
Date: 2008-03-02 09:29 am (UTC)Hope you are feeling better already!
no subject
Date: 2008-03-03 05:30 am (UTC)