![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif){kind=small}
metaquotesFirstly - exams. Finally. Over. My thoughts?
Geoscience - "Yeah, I did IB Geography, Higher Level. I'll be fine."
Stats - OMG. *ded*
Classical Studies - You sweet little thing, I love you. Really.
Archaeology - "Okay, so there's Egypt and Babylon and pharaohs and mummies and Mycenaens and Nefertiti and - oh crud, was Ur the capital of Akkad? Did Jericho have a wall and a tower? I'll just write really general points and hope for the best."
And now, I present... Moments in the Life of El!
--------------------
SURREAL WEEKEND MOMENT #1
I cleaned the keyboard. With a blob of bluetack. At 12.30am on Friday night.
I think this says a lot. I don't know what it says, but whatever it's saying, there's a large quantity of it.
--------------------
SURREAL WEEKEND MOMENT #2
I found a bottle of baby oil in the bathroom. A full bottle. Of baby oil.
So my brain went places that I really didn't want it to go, and concluded that someone in the house is either expecting to get some or has a bottle of baby oil 'just in case'. I didn't buy it (unless I've been sleepshopping again...) so that leaves father or brother. I honestly don't know which scares me more.
Then again, it might just be the Baby Oil Gnomes who have randomly given us this gift.
--------------------
SURREAL WEEKEND MOMENT #3
The scene: Sunday night, somehow the discussion has turned to politics. Mother has just made a comment about Costello and Howard...
BROTHER: It's like Costello is Kiff, and Howard is Zap Brannigan.
ME: *brain go smoogly* YOU BASTARD!
BROTHER: Que?
ME: You just put the image of Howard dressed as Zap Brannigan in my head, and no amount of bleach is going to erase it. You owe me a new brain.
--------------------
EL'S MONDAY:
Wake up at 7.30. Go back to sleep. Wake up at midday. Go downstairs, make tea. Remove cat from vent on which clothes are meant to be drying. Make breakfast. Watch 3.5 episodes of Star Trek: TOS with brother. Remove cat from vent. Eat sausage roll. Begin watching The Three Amigos. Remove cat from vent. Go on computer. Eat dinner. Remove cat from vent. Watch first ten minutes of Torchwood and tape the rest. Remove cat from vent. Go to bed.
--------------------
And finally, this afternoon...
EL: Returns from exams, has tasty pastie for lunch, begins doing crossword.
CAT: Love me?
EL: Oh, fine.
CAT: *jump* *mooch* Loooooooove you.
EL: Yes, dear, I love you too. Plz to be sitting down now.
CAT: *sit*
EL: *leans forward slightly to resume crossword*
CAT: ARGH the world is capsizing OH THANK GOD they've brought lifeboats.
EL: ARGH get your claws off sensitive female areas!
CAT: Fine. *sulk*
EL: *leans forward again*
*repeat scene*
CAT: Meh, bored now.
EL: *glare* If I have to explain why my cleavage has claw marks, it will be ALL YOUR FAULT.
Geoscience - "Yeah, I did IB Geography, Higher Level. I'll be fine."
Stats - OMG. *ded*
Classical Studies - You sweet little thing, I love you. Really.
Archaeology - "Okay, so there's Egypt and Babylon and pharaohs and mummies and Mycenaens and Nefertiti and - oh crud, was Ur the capital of Akkad? Did Jericho have a wall and a tower? I'll just write really general points and hope for the best."
And now, I present... Moments in the Life of El!
--------------------
SURREAL WEEKEND MOMENT #1
I cleaned the keyboard. With a blob of bluetack. At 12.30am on Friday night.
I think this says a lot. I don't know what it says, but whatever it's saying, there's a large quantity of it.
--------------------
SURREAL WEEKEND MOMENT #2
I found a bottle of baby oil in the bathroom. A full bottle. Of baby oil.
So my brain went places that I really didn't want it to go, and concluded that someone in the house is either expecting to get some or has a bottle of baby oil 'just in case'. I didn't buy it (unless I've been sleepshopping again...) so that leaves father or brother. I honestly don't know which scares me more.
Then again, it might just be the Baby Oil Gnomes who have randomly given us this gift.
--------------------
SURREAL WEEKEND MOMENT #3
The scene: Sunday night, somehow the discussion has turned to politics. Mother has just made a comment about Costello and Howard...
BROTHER: It's like Costello is Kiff, and Howard is Zap Brannigan.
ME: *brain go smoogly* YOU BASTARD!
BROTHER: Que?
ME: You just put the image of Howard dressed as Zap Brannigan in my head, and no amount of bleach is going to erase it. You owe me a new brain.
--------------------
EL'S MONDAY:
Wake up at 7.30. Go back to sleep. Wake up at midday. Go downstairs, make tea. Remove cat from vent on which clothes are meant to be drying. Make breakfast. Watch 3.5 episodes of Star Trek: TOS with brother. Remove cat from vent. Eat sausage roll. Begin watching The Three Amigos. Remove cat from vent. Go on computer. Eat dinner. Remove cat from vent. Watch first ten minutes of Torchwood and tape the rest. Remove cat from vent. Go to bed.
--------------------
And finally, this afternoon...
EL: Returns from exams, has tasty pastie for lunch, begins doing crossword.
CAT: Love me?
EL: Oh, fine.
CAT: *jump* *mooch* Loooooooove you.
EL: Yes, dear, I love you too. Plz to be sitting down now.
CAT: *sit*
EL: *leans forward slightly to resume crossword*
CAT: ARGH the world is capsizing OH THANK GOD they've brought lifeboats.
EL: ARGH get your claws off sensitive female areas!
CAT: Fine. *sulk*
EL: *leans forward again*
*repeat scene*
CAT: Meh, bored now.
EL: *glare* If I have to explain why my cleavage has claw marks, it will be ALL YOUR FAULT.
